(no subject)
Jul. 26th, 2014 01:53 am[Left on one of the beds in the servant's quarters.]
Okay. Hey guys. Assuming that a rat hasn’t found this and chewed it up or peed all over it yet (I know you have them trained, Gundam, but that doesn’t explain why my coffee tastes funny every other morning), you might be wondering where I am and why I wrote this, huh? Don’t freak out, I’m totally fine. Actually, I’ll probably be back in a few hours or so if I’m not already, so you don’t have to keep reading this letter at all. It’s probably better if you didn’t, it might get kind of embarrassing later, I don’t know, I haven’t really planned out what I’m going to write yet. I’m just scribbling down something quick so you guys know not to stab everyone or unleash a rat army because you can’t stand being away from me for more than a few hours. (See, Kaoru? Totally should have gotten the walkie-talkies, it would have been awesome.)
Right. Anyway, the point is that the producers are really fucking pissed off at what Kuzuryuu and the DKs did. They can’t do anything about Nanami possibly retiring now, not without breaking their own rules, but they’re not going to let the players get away with trying to break the game either. I’ve already gotten the orders - no matter what happens or how this trial ends, all the hostages will be executed.
So...yeah. Obviously we can’t let that happen, so I’m just going to pop in that room really fast and set them free.
Stop yelling about what a sentimental and reckless idiot I am - yes, I can totally hear both of you doing it, cut it out before you draw everyone’s attention. This isn’t an emotional decision, it’s a strategic one. I’ve sat down and watched every season of this show, even the really terrible ones where it was basically American Idol with murder (never let it be said that I’m not dedicated to our cause), and there actually have been a few where the round was so brutal that people just...gave up. We can’t afford to let that happen. The no-kill week has to be because all of the players left are actively fighting back by declaring that there is no incentive worth playing along with this game for, not because they’ve been so broken that they just don’t care what happens anymore. And if those hostages die, that second scenario is going to be exactly what will happen. They’ll turn on each other or completely fall into despair, but either way, the producers will be able to write it off as just another exciting ending to the game and start fresh with a new batch of contestants.
Also Gundam, you were right. Not about Austria having decent reasons for murdering Spain, she still sucks hardcore and it was still stupid as hell, but that the players shouldn’t just be sitting back and waiting on false hope. But the same goes for us, yeah? We’ve set up the preparations, but most of what we’ve been doing is just sitting back and hoping that they’ll get the message and not play along with the game, even though that’s exactly what we did in our round. They need that final push, so I’m going to give it to them. If they know that they aren’t alone, that there are people outside trying to help them, then...that should be enough to get them to finally bring this game to an end.
And...there’s one more reason why I want to save the hostages. I’ve been thinking about this ever since they first showed up, but Nanami’s hostage...was the same as Gundam’s, wasn’t he? Not only that, but he doesn’t look like he’s aged a day.I was so afraid that I know a lot of us were wondering what happened to the hostages from our round, whether they really were sent home or whether they were killed after what happened with our season. At least now we know they’re not dead. If they were sent home, that means that we’re right, getting dragged into this show isn’t a one-way ticket after all. Even if the secret’s heavily guarded, it’s still entirely possible for us to go back to our worlds. (Well, me. Your worlds both sound seriously awful so I’m dragging you guys along with me, Chizuru and the other SHSL kids and Annie and Kanaya can come too, this show has a ton of money so we’ll just steal it on our way out and set up a mansion everyone can live in, it’ll be awesome. Lots of supernatural shit you can both stab or summon too so you won’t be bored.) And if they weren’t, it means they’re being kept in stasis somewhere and we still have a chance to save them. Either way, it’s information that we need to know.
Anyway! I’m making this sound like a super serious goodbye letter when it’s totally not, so stop panicking. I’m not taking any unnecessary risks, I’ve already contacted the combat-ready non-squishy humans group back at base and they’ll get the hostages to safety. But we need someone with backstage access to get into that room at all, and I’m the only one here who can do it. It should be a simple enough job - cut the ropes, get them out before anyone even notices something’s happened, run back here in time for Maya to start prattling to me about burgers again. Not a problem. Hell, I’m probably behind you guys right now trying to grab this letter from your hands while you read it out loud, aren’t I? COME ON, FUTURE STILES, YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT, THIS LETTER’S JUST GOING TO GET WORSE FROM HERE. And if I’m running a little late, it’s only because I got held up by Susan lecturing me about what an idiot I am and just had to take a few hours to soak in all of her sensible badassery before having to come back to trials where none of the players have any of it at all.
But just in case I get lost in the woods and wind up coming back a little later than I planned. If they do pull off a no-kill week, then we need to set everything into motion before the producers try to figure out a way to salvage the show. We’ve managed to work a virus into the castle’s power supply. The trigger phrase is ‘Witamy z powrotem’ - you’ve heard me and Poland say it enough times to each other to know how to pronounce it, right? Say it anywhere in the castle and it’ll shut down all the power and also signal to the group to start making their move. But it’ll take them at least an hour or more to get here and it’ll also de-electrify the fence, so you need to make sure no one tries to leave first. They’ll just wind up straight back into the show’s hands. ALSO DO NOT LET SEBASTIAN TORTURE ANYONE HOLY HELL WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT GUY.
And if they don’t pull off a no-kill week after this...I don’t care how horrible it makes me sound, bail out. Do what you can for the graveyard, but nine weeks with no DKs and no mastermind and the hostages mysteriously rescued is our limit. If they don’t make a stand then, they never will. The only thing we can do at that point is to get out with our lives and try to save who we can if we have the time.
Anyway, I’m off. See you guys in a few hours or so.
[Delivered by rat at around 6AM.]
Okay, I lied, I’m not off yet. If you’re reading this, then either something did go wrong and I’m not back yet, or the rats are dirty traitors and delivered this note way too soon when I told them not to do anything unless it was still under the bed by the time the sun’s come up. Or maybe they just don’t understand human language, but seeing as how Gundam’s been training them, I seriously doubt that’s the case.
Anyway, if something did happen, then I just needed to say one, don’t do anything stupid to try to rescue me and two, that I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry. Not about trying to save the hostages, we don’t have any choice here, but about fucking up somewhere along the way and leaving you guys on your own.It’s not like I wanted to I don’t want you two to think that I thought the hostages were more important than you or that I decided to martyr myself or something, I know I’ve pulled some really stupid shit in the past but this isn’t like that. Obviously something went wrong along the way, but there’s no way I wouldn’t have fought like hell to get back because I
Screw it, I’ll just say it, if I’m not here when this note is delivered you can’t make fun of me for being a sap anyway. I really do love you guys IN A TOTALLY PLATONIC AND MANLY WAY. Stop gagging, you know you love me too. I don't know if I believe in the players here - honestly, no matter how many sentimental speeches about sticking together they give, this entire game has reminded me of our own round where it was just week after week of being disappointed in humanity. But I do believe in the two of you, completely and utterly. You guys went through hell and came out stronger and better for it. You can bring it to an end.
Annnnd that's about all the time and touchy-feeliness I have left. Gonna take a raincheck, we will totally hug it out and then go watch manly things like football after I get back.
Okay. Hey guys. Assuming that a rat hasn’t found this and chewed it up or peed all over it yet (I know you have them trained, Gundam, but that doesn’t explain why my coffee tastes funny every other morning), you might be wondering where I am and why I wrote this, huh? Don’t freak out, I’m totally fine. Actually, I’ll probably be back in a few hours or so if I’m not already, so you don’t have to keep reading this letter at all. It’s probably better if you didn’t, it might get kind of embarrassing later, I don’t know, I haven’t really planned out what I’m going to write yet. I’m just scribbling down something quick so you guys know not to stab everyone or unleash a rat army because you can’t stand being away from me for more than a few hours. (See, Kaoru? Totally should have gotten the walkie-talkies, it would have been awesome.)
Right. Anyway, the point is that the producers are really fucking pissed off at what Kuzuryuu and the DKs did. They can’t do anything about Nanami possibly retiring now, not without breaking their own rules, but they’re not going to let the players get away with trying to break the game either. I’ve already gotten the orders - no matter what happens or how this trial ends, all the hostages will be executed.
So...yeah. Obviously we can’t let that happen, so I’m just going to pop in that room really fast and set them free.
Stop yelling about what a sentimental and reckless idiot I am - yes, I can totally hear both of you doing it, cut it out before you draw everyone’s attention. This isn’t an emotional decision, it’s a strategic one. I’ve sat down and watched every season of this show, even the really terrible ones where it was basically American Idol with murder (never let it be said that I’m not dedicated to our cause), and there actually have been a few where the round was so brutal that people just...gave up. We can’t afford to let that happen. The no-kill week has to be because all of the players left are actively fighting back by declaring that there is no incentive worth playing along with this game for, not because they’ve been so broken that they just don’t care what happens anymore. And if those hostages die, that second scenario is going to be exactly what will happen. They’ll turn on each other or completely fall into despair, but either way, the producers will be able to write it off as just another exciting ending to the game and start fresh with a new batch of contestants.
Also Gundam, you were right. Not about Austria having decent reasons for murdering Spain, she still sucks hardcore and it was still stupid as hell, but that the players shouldn’t just be sitting back and waiting on false hope. But the same goes for us, yeah? We’ve set up the preparations, but most of what we’ve been doing is just sitting back and hoping that they’ll get the message and not play along with the game, even though that’s exactly what we did in our round. They need that final push, so I’m going to give it to them. If they know that they aren’t alone, that there are people outside trying to help them, then...that should be enough to get them to finally bring this game to an end.
And...there’s one more reason why I want to save the hostages. I’ve been thinking about this ever since they first showed up, but Nanami’s hostage...was the same as Gundam’s, wasn’t he? Not only that, but he doesn’t look like he’s aged a day.
Anyway! I’m making this sound like a super serious goodbye letter when it’s totally not, so stop panicking. I’m not taking any unnecessary risks, I’ve already contacted the combat-ready non-squishy humans group back at base and they’ll get the hostages to safety. But we need someone with backstage access to get into that room at all, and I’m the only one here who can do it. It should be a simple enough job - cut the ropes, get them out before anyone even notices something’s happened, run back here in time for Maya to start prattling to me about burgers again. Not a problem. Hell, I’m probably behind you guys right now trying to grab this letter from your hands while you read it out loud, aren’t I? COME ON, FUTURE STILES, YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT, THIS LETTER’S JUST GOING TO GET WORSE FROM HERE. And if I’m running a little late, it’s only because I got held up by Susan lecturing me about what an idiot I am and just had to take a few hours to soak in all of her sensible badassery before having to come back to trials where none of the players have any of it at all.
But just in case I get lost in the woods and wind up coming back a little later than I planned. If they do pull off a no-kill week, then we need to set everything into motion before the producers try to figure out a way to salvage the show. We’ve managed to work a virus into the castle’s power supply. The trigger phrase is ‘Witamy z powrotem’ - you’ve heard me and Poland say it enough times to each other to know how to pronounce it, right? Say it anywhere in the castle and it’ll shut down all the power and also signal to the group to start making their move. But it’ll take them at least an hour or more to get here and it’ll also de-electrify the fence, so you need to make sure no one tries to leave first. They’ll just wind up straight back into the show’s hands. ALSO DO NOT LET SEBASTIAN TORTURE ANYONE HOLY HELL WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT GUY.
And if they don’t pull off a no-kill week after this...I don’t care how horrible it makes me sound, bail out. Do what you can for the graveyard, but nine weeks with no DKs and no mastermind and the hostages mysteriously rescued is our limit. If they don’t make a stand then, they never will. The only thing we can do at that point is to get out with our lives and try to save who we can if we have the time.
Anyway, I’m off. See you guys in a few hours or so.
[Delivered by rat at around 6AM.]
Okay, I lied, I’m not off yet. If you’re reading this, then either something did go wrong and I’m not back yet, or the rats are dirty traitors and delivered this note way too soon when I told them not to do anything unless it was still under the bed by the time the sun’s come up. Or maybe they just don’t understand human language, but seeing as how Gundam’s been training them, I seriously doubt that’s the case.
Anyway, if something did happen, then I just needed to say one, don’t do anything stupid to try to rescue me and two, that I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry. Not about trying to save the hostages, we don’t have any choice here, but about fucking up somewhere along the way and leaving you guys on your own.
Screw it, I’ll just say it, if I’m not here when this note is delivered you can’t make fun of me for being a sap anyway. I really do love you guys IN A TOTALLY PLATONIC AND MANLY WAY. Stop gagging, you know you love me too. I don't know if I believe in the players here - honestly, no matter how many sentimental speeches about sticking together they give, this entire game has reminded me of our own round where it was just week after week of being disappointed in humanity. But I do believe in the two of you, completely and utterly. You guys went through hell and came out stronger and better for it. You can bring it to an end.
Annnnd that's about all the time and touchy-feeliness I have left. Gonna take a raincheck, we will totally hug it out and then go watch manly things like football after I get back.